I’m Done

Healing is not my purpose... Making the decision to do some healing work is such a commitment and an honor to oneself. It can be exciting and scary at the same time. You go out and buy all the books, see all the professionals, take all the herbs, and even manage to do the work. Your body aches. Your soul aches. You’ve cried so many tears and are now able to smile or even manage a laugh. Your walk is straight and your talk is more affirming and has boundaries. Life is great. Right. So what’s next?

This is where one can get lost on the healing journey.

The healing journey is lifelong, yes. However, it goes from healing to wellness. On the path of healing, you will come to a fork in the road. The left is returning to old ways and the right is moving into wellness. The straight path is continuing on with healing. So let’s talk about these roads a little more in detail.

The Left Path

The left path is the path that circles back to the self-defeating behaviors and the wounds we left behind. When one decides to take the left path, it is mostly out of fear of what’s next. In all honesty, our self-defeating behaviors are comfortable. We know what to expect. They have become part of who we are. The wounds can cause attachment issues where we are attached to the wounds because, in our codependent selves, we feed the wound. As we step onto the fork in the road, we are faced with this fear. The question is: will I let fear be the puppet master of me or will I work through it to know what’s on the other side?

The Right Path

The right path is the one that goes on, away from the wound and the self-defeating behaviors. The right path leads us to wellness. Many of us aren’t aware that this path actually exists. It is confused with the healing journey. The wellness journey is focused on applying what you’ve learned on your healing journey to maintain stability, happiness, joy, and healthy functioning. Wellness is not about healing but about maintaining the healed self, inner child or real self. This is where you say I am done with that story and ready to create a new story. As we step onto the fork in the road, the question here is: are you ready to continue your commitment to your real self?

The Straight Path

The straight path is just a continuation of healing. This means that you are still on this path even after the wounds have been healed. This also means that you may be on this path if you didn’t heal the wounds and just put bandages on them. We can talk about bandages in another post. People will continue the straight path if they have become addicted to healing. Healing has become their new identity and they continue to read self-help books, stay with their therapist or practitioner for years, and always talk about the wound. The straight path is where one becomes codependent on the wound and the idea of healing. Yes, talk. I will admit that healing feels good and puts you in a new space in life; however, the space can wear out. As you step onto the fork in the road, the question here is: am I ready to narrate my new story?

So there you have it. There are three paths on this journey that we can take for our wellbeing or healing. My hope is that you find a practitioner that helps you reach “I’m Done” so that wellness is the new you.

As Toni Jones says, healing should not be our purpose.

Our purpose is to live and healing is just part of the journey.